You've got a Friend in Me

Tim and I post-game

The song by Randy Newman, made famous by the original Toy Story movie, played along in my mind as I considered how to write this post. Last night was truly an unforgettable experience at the ballpark. One of my best friends was on my left side, and my late father's former boss was on my right. Baseball is truly the best. It brings together people from all walks of life and gives those who go to games a unique experience.

For the last three years, I have asked my good friend Tim to attend a baseball game with me. Usually, he is busy, but this was the night he was finally free to join me. The number of times Tim thanked me for the experience probably broke the Guinness World Record for thanking someone in a three-hour window. All jokes aside, I wanted to share some memories of Tim in a way that shows what a fantastic person and friend he has been.

Firstly, Tim is an accomplished emergency department nurse whom I met during my hospital job. I think there were a lot of situations where we trauma-bonded. Trauma bonding is what drives relationships in a hospital setting. As a social worker in the emergency department, I wasn't doing much of the heavy lifting medically like Tim was and still does. Still, I was gathering information for the emotional side of the job. When we weren't handling emergencies, we would sit at the nurses' station and talk about sports. That wasn't the bulk of the job, but having a break every so often in a chaotic environment is helpful. Emergency medicine separates the great nurses from the rest. The people I met working that job were incredible. Every single person, from the environmental services cleaning crew, to the patient care technicians, to the nurses, our physicians, and physician assistants. Working that job takes a special person, and Tim fits that mold perfectly. He is dedicated to his patients and teaching those who are brand new to the world of emergency nursing. My cousin recently started working at Allegheny General Hospital, and I wish he had been under Tim's direction when he began. I'm sure his preceptor was good, but Tim is great. He set a lot of people up for success in that field.

I had long heard from Tim during our talks about the Pirates that his mom and dad have been huge Pirates fans all of their lives. Tim is a fan of FaceTime for communication purposes, so during the game, he was constantly FaceTiming his parents and was enthralled with the seating arrangement. Being able to see the people who raised a saint for the first time was helpful to put faces to names. I am sure they are incredibly proud of him and who he is as a person, father, and friend.

When I got the news that my dad was in the hospital, and I left work because of it, it was Tim who wished me good luck. When I came back to the hospital that evening to be surrounded by the people who had my back in our field, it was a hug from Tim that made me know things were going to be okay, no matter how they ended. When my dad eventually did pass away, Tim had been there for me. He always shared my dealings with my grief, and they inspired him. He told me frequently he was proud of how strong I was, and he regularly checked in on me and asked how my mom was doing. Shortly after my dad's passing, I lost his best friend, Tom, and without missing a beat, Tim remained a great presence in my life. It was all that trauma bonding from our time together in the emergency room.

When I think of what makes a good friend, I think of Tim. Although he has been busy most of the time, I have asked him to a game. I wouldn't quit asking until he could finally go with me. The experience in the home plate club is unlike any other baseball experience. The fanfare, the comfy seats, the buffet meal, and the ushers make the experience unforgettable. One of the best guys in that section is the guy who tosses the snacks to the person in the seat, Rick. Rick is always dressed in a baseball uniform. He and I have a streak where he has given me a bag of Cracker Jacks every game I have attended for the last two years.

From left to right: Tim, Rick, AJ

As I mentioned earlier, when I was thinking of the post's title, I listened to "You've Got a Friend in Me." Last night was a good reset for me. Going to baseball games has always significantly boosted my mental health. Win or lose, the atmosphere is terrific. Going to a game with someone as great a friend as Tim made it all the more enjoyable.

When the road looks rough ahead, and you're miles and miles from your nice warm bed, boy, you've got a friend in me. You've got troubles, and I've got 'em too. And as the years go by, our friendship will never die...